Growing up Presbyterian

 As if becoming confirmed was not enough of a milestone in Ashley's faith, this week she did something many people have not done. She preached her first sermon. This was in no way a requirement of becoming confirmed, especially since she preached it at a different church. Many Sunday's I attend the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville's evening worship service, called Worship in a New Key, or WiNK for short. WiNK features different music and a different approach to worship, all while staying true to the PCUSA liturgy and order of worship. It is an awesome experience. I invite all of you to join me one week during the school year for worship.

Back to my story. Ashley's 7th grade teacher CS taught her class about the story behind Amazing Grace. Ashley was so moved, she wanted to share the story with the congregation. 

It was such a moving service, in part due to the gospel singing led by Ashley's voice teacher Dr. Trineice. Also because how I envisioned the service actually came to life. I invited a bunch of people to WiNK and they came. It helped I threw a BBQ before the service (in honor of Ashley's 13th birthday) to encourage family to come down and celebrate with us. A true testament to the belief that most people come to church because they were invited. What is normally a very quiet Sunday in this service (due to the nice weather, and seminarians graduating the day before) because a spirit-filled, and body-filled service praising God through old-fashioned Gospel songs. The other two received a short introduction by Pastor Matt, and a solo by Dr. Trineice. Ashley read Ephesians 2:1-10 as part of her introduction to her mini-sermon. She the sang the first verse as a solo -- a big step for Ashley who is trying to become comfortable singing in public. She did an amazing job. Once again, I am super proud of her.

Thank you for the friends and family who came to worship with us to celebrate with Ashley.

Here is the main text of what she said. It may have changed slightly, but you can click on the above YouTube link if you want to hear it "live."

For as often as you've sung and heard "Amazing Grace" have you ever wondered about the story behind the words? 

I recently had to write an essay on the slave trade, and my teacher made a comment about how one of the slavers we had been studying wrote the song, and she told us the little-known story behind it, which I thought was amazing and should be told.

Slave trader John Newton was on his way to pick up some more slaves and transport them over to the colonies, where after a three-month journey of being starved and beaten, the slaves were sold for a few dollars and made to work in the harsh sun of the southern colonies. However, Newton was soon caught in a terrible storm, of which he didn't know if he would survive. So he did what many people would do: angrily shouted at God, and made a promise that if he did live, he would become a much better person, and would stop being a slave trader. Well, Newton did survive, and unlike most people, he held true to his word. He turned his life around and stopped treating people so harshly. Later, he wrote the song "Amazing Grace," which is now a famous and well-known song, but not many know the historical significance behind it. 

Even though that song was written a couple hundred years ago, there are some things that still apply to us every day. The first, the most obvious, but perhaps the most important is to be a good person, even though it is sometimes hard. My motto for this year is: "Don't be mean in 2015." Of course, that also rhymes with 2016 and 2017, and so on, but it's still a good thing to live by. We should also always remember that God is with us, by our side when we need him, and when we don't. He's there with us in good times, and in bad, not just when we need help. 

The other message is also an important one to remember: to keep our promises. John Newton could have easily said, "oh, well, the storms over, I'm alive, that's good." He could have kept on going, and never thought about the experience again. Instead, he did something that people usually don't, he not only remembered his promise, he did what he said he would. He stopped being so cruel and heartless, and even wrote a song about what happened to him. Newton had only been thinking of the money he would receive for managing to keep most of the slaves alive. He had, in effect, been "blind," but now he "sees," and "lost," but now he's "found." It took a near-death experience to open his eyes to the world around him. 

There are several clues to Newton's experience in his song. He says "how precious did that grace appear, the hour I first believed," saying how happy he is that he became a better person and is following God's path for him now. He talks about how many toils and snares he's already gone through, but that grace will always lead him home. By the "toils and snares" I think he means his work as a slave dealer, and by grace leading him home, I think he's saying that he will always follow God now that he has discovered what he was missing. Newton also says how the Lord has promised good to him. By this, I believe he's saying that he knows that even though he was bad, he is a good person now, and God forgives him for how he was. 

Confirmation Day

Our little girl is not so little anymore. Last week Ashley officially became a teenager. As my friends tell me, life just keeps on picking up speed. We try to enjoy having her around, but she seems to want to be with us less and less each week. It is both normal and sad.

Earlier this month she became confirmed as a Presbyterian at the Lawrence Road Presbyterian Church (LRPC) -- a PCUSA church for those who understand the differences. This means, in the eyes of the church she is an adult with the rights and privileges that come with adulthood -- mostly the ability to vote and the expectation to pay apportionment to the Presbytery (a relatively small fee most Presbyterians don't realize the church is required to pay the Presbytery).

This followed a school year's worth of classes every Sunday morning between the two worship services, as well as some field trips. The field trips were fun. One was to our former church, First Presbyterian Church of Hamilton Square, to see their contemporary service. 

She had to write a statement of faith, which was I found to be very moving. She also choose a mentor. In her case, the mentor's name is also Ashley, but that was certainly not a requirement. Ashley E was thrilled to be chosen. Both Ashley's love animals and are kind to people.

Ashley and her classmates led worship one Sunday in April. Ashley's roles were giving the children's sermon and the benediction. The scripture reading was Luke 8:26-39 -- Jesus chasing the demons out of Legion and into the pigs. After a little bit of research on the topic (otherwise known as googling, shh... don't tell my librarian colleagues) I came across this story where the children were told about sea urchins and how they look ugly, but is beautiful on the inside. We talked i through, and came up with showing a picture of Sandy Dragon - how he looks scary on the outside, but his spikes are just for show and are the softest parts of his body. How Jesus was not afraid when he met Legion -- who was one very scary looking person -- and how we should be more like Jesus who was not afraid even though he looked strange. If I can find the actual text, I'll add it in later. She did an awesome job, much better than my paraphrasing.


Her benediction was a take on the new Cinderella movie "Have courage and be kind." Not sure if anyone got that.

Prior to the service on May 10, Session had a special meeting to "grill" them (so it felt to the kids, I suspect) and vote them in as official members.

It was a beautiful service.

This Spring we attended a bar and bat mitzvah service -- a first for all of us. At the bar mitzvah the mother made a speech which resonated with me. To echo her sentiments, and modify them for our little girl:

So now the church considers you to be an adult. But we don't think of you this way. You won't have to now move out and get a job to support yourself. Your top job is still to be a student. We will still support you and pay for your education. It is time, though, to take on more responsibilities. Time to help others, and to help us. You are awesome. We love you.

Playing Hooky

After being a voter, a home owner, a drivers licence holder, and overall American adult since the late 1980s, I received a notice to serve jury duty and had no legitimate reason not to serve.

I received my first notice over a decade ago. I had a newborn baby and begged them to not make me serve. Give me some time to wean her first. Fortunately they listened and gave me over 10 year. 

Jury duty turned out to be a lot of fun. When I showed up at the massive parking lot by the Sun Center, I bumped into Susie, a mom I had not seen since Ashley was in kindergarten. We picked right up where we left off. We bypassed the bus and walked to the court house on Broad Street, only to quickly learn they moved. We met another woman "just getting off from work" wearing 5 inch spiked heels. Hmm... The three of us found the right building, and went through security. Then we couldn't figure out where to go. Neither could any of the regular employees. It was quite comedic. Fortunately it had a happy ending.

Susie and I finally found the right place. Thirty jurors were taken for a different case. The rest of us (hundreds -- they called 650 numbers that day) were told to wait. And wait. And watch a video. And wait. We were told about the case. It was to last two weeks -- two unpaid weeks for a freelancer/sub like me. Susie asked to be excused based on prior knowledge. I asked to be excused based on hardship. The judge was being kind and let us both go.


Susie and I then looked at each other. It was a nice day. It was lunch time. We could see the RiverLine. Hmm... so we hopped on the train and took it to Burlington for lunch. We chose Legends Pizza. I had the Ziggy salad.

It truly felt as if we were playing hooky for the day. I half-expected to come home to a message saying I misunderstood the concept of being excused. Nothing spectacular happened that day. We walked around an old town. Had lunch together and reconnected. I guess that is what made it special. Rather than hightailing it the moment Susie was free, she waited an extra 5-10 minutes to see if I would be freed, too, and we enjoyed each other's company. Had we tried to plan the day, it would not have happened, but serendipity brought us together.

As for the case, I'll probably never learn the outcome. Someone else I know was in the room for jury selection. He was asked to come back the next day while they narrowed down the jury.

Maybe next time I'll be in a position to be able to put my life on hold for two weeks while I help decide someone's fate. I'm not there yet. In this meantime, this reminded me of an earlier goal for the year.

Follow up to earlier post

A few months ago I posted: PSA: What I don't want to learn about on Facebook, a quick list of announcements that should not be told to immediate family and really close friends at the same time as announcing it to the greater world. So far 63 of you have read it, which makes it one of my most read stories on this blog.

Following my diagnosis, which still hurts me to think about or talk about much, I don't like to see Facebook posts about food. The expression "food porn" had evolved over the past few years. A little piece of me is torn apart when I see pictures of food I know I will probably never be able to enjoy again -- even if I can have a taste of it, I can't fully enjoy guilt-free as I could only a few months ago. I'm not going to ask people to stop posting pictures of food. I try to skim over them, or hide the images in a twisted way of letting FB what I *really* want to see. 

Why do I bring this up? Recently a few friends have recently posted how hurtful Mother's Day is now that they have lost their mother, or child, or have not been able to have children, or have had miscarriages, or any combination of the above, or any reason I can't imagine. I can see your pain in your posts and when we talk or email. I wish I could take it away.

I'm not going to apologize for having a mother and a daughter, hence reasons to celebrate Mother's Day. I can try to honor your wishes and hide you from my posts, but Facebook is funny -- it shows you what it thinks you want to see.  

I'm also not going to ask you to stop posting pictures or talking about food I'll never be able to eat, or talking about visiting places I'll never be able to afford to visit. If Mother's Day, or any day, is that hard, you have to stay away. If looking at food porn is too hard for me, I have to stay away. 

I want to ride my bicyle

I think I have a new addiction: bicycling. It seems every 5 years or so I shift from one form of exercise to another. During my first job I walked with a co-worker. That transitioned to rollerblading in the park (one of the benefits to moving to this neighborhood was that Village Park is perfect for rollerblading). About five years ago I took up running. Now cycling is catching my interest.

Last fall I wrote an article about Bruno's: One Sweet Ride, a father-daughter shop selling bicycles and candy. Somehow in downtown Allentown the odd combination happens to work. While writing the story I decided to return in the spring to buy a new bicycle. Over the years I have had bicycles. One year Don bought me a bike from the Trenton Bike Exchange. It was probably the army green color that turned me off (though when we bought it I thought I could live with it), or the fact that within a few minutes of riding my knee would hurt (probably from a poor fit, but I never got a proper fit).

I targeted the weekend after Easter as the day I would buy a cute, girly bike. I had planned to purchase an Electra, but with only seven speeds those are meant as beach boardwalk bikes. Bruno gently talked me into a Trek that is designed for comfort, not speed. I sit up on it. It has shocks in the front and on the seat. I hardly feel any bumps when I take it out on the Lawrence Hopewell Trail. We've already been on two family rides, and are looking forward to more.

As with anything, one purchase creates a wish list of other purchases. I've requested a basket for Mother's Day. She also needs a cage for a water bottle (or maybe I can put that in my new basket -- hint, hint). A bell would be nice (for now I just say "beep beep, passing on left"). So would a light for when it starts to get dark earlier. Oh the list just keeps on growing.

I'm still debating on her name, but Catie seems to be winning.

Beep Beep -- see you on the trail.

Neighborhood Garage Sale

For the past few years our neighborhood has been hosting an annual garage sale. It was started by a former neighbor, who is also a real estate agent. It always happens in May, which is always the busiest month for us, so we've ignored it. Some years we've been around and we have checked out other people's treasures. Some years we have put on blinders and ignored the whole thing. Some years we have just not been home. 

This year we tried something different. Rather than selling stuff, we put it out on our driveway with a sign saying FREE and walked away. It started with some bikes destined for the Trenton Bike Exchange and left the house. Those disappeared, Ashley's favorite vintage pink bike with the banana seat was a tough parting for her, but she admits it is too small and she likes having brakes on her hands.

Next we put out items too big to bring to a rummage sale, but not being used -- mostly ancient exercise equipment. We put out speakers we used 15+ years ago as end tables (after we no longer used them as actual speakers). We had much entertainment just watching cars slow down, eye up items, and take them home with them. Much more fun than we would have had trying to sell the same items (haggling, making sure nothing gets stolen, etc.). As things disappeared, we added more to the piles. 


Our only regret, is that we didn't think of this years ago, or start piling items sooner. 

Meanwhile, our Little Free Library also had a lot of traffic that day. I had replenished it the day before. When I noticed it was half empty, I restocked it again. Hope they come back to visit again.

2015 runBucks 10 miler

My running goal for 2015 is to run races between 5 and 10 miles. Shorter than that it hardly seems worthy of the time to pay for the race, drive to the start line, and do the race. Longer than that feels like too much work.

I hoped my first race of 2015 would be the runBucks Mother's Day 10K -- a nice women 's focus race, plus it is on Mother's Day, so I get to choose the activity. Our church had other plans. They decided May 10th would be the perfect day for confirmation, and Ashley is a member of the confirmation class. Okay, plan B. What other races are being run by runBucks? Oh, look ... they have a 10 miler on May 3. 10 miles. 10 kilometers. Practically the same, right?

You are all smart enough to know there is about 3.8 miles difference between a 10K and a 10 miler. No, they are not the same. Back in February when I hit the registration button, I had plenty of time to train, besides, it was still within my race distance goal range.

I also thought I'd have my diet under control. This was my first race after my recent diagnosis. I'm still not comfortable going public with this information, and since only a few people actually read the blog, and less will click on the link, and those that do are the ones who truly care about me, this hardly feels like going public. As a result, I have completely changed my diet from eating what I feel like, but aiming for low-fat higher carbs to low carbs higher protein and fat. Not the typical runner's diet, but I've never thought of myself as a typical runner.

What does one eat prior to and during a race when she is trying to eat low carbs, and aiming for low glycemic ones at that? When you know the answer to that, please share it with me. I had a chicken dinner with a huge salad and 2/3 cup of spaghetti squash the night before the race. I ate 2/3 of a sweet potato prior to the race. Downed a GU gel during the race (forgot how much they stick to your teeth, so I stopped at one), and some watered down Gatorade at a water stop. Post-race food was mostly carbs (go figure), but they did have some meatballs, so that's what I ate. I also had a Strong Kind bar on the drive home.

My life has been revolving around food since early February, and now (so it seems) are my race blogs.

Let's get back to the fun part -- the race. 

The 10 mile race was held on May 3 -- the same day as the Broad Street Run in Philly. It was billed as an alternative to the BSR -- same distance, but without the lottery and the crowds. To put it in perspective, BSR has 40,000 runners, this would cap out at 500. BSR has a lottery to see if you get in. This one took registrations day of. They only had 250 runners. RunBucks had same day packet pick-up, and easy parking. Take that BSR!

 It was a picturesque, flat route along the canal starting in Washington Crossing, PA. We went up five miles. Turned around. Came back five miles. There were 3 water stops -- used twice each, so a nice interval.

This year's theme was nerds. I wore my Princeton Half Marathon Einstein shirt with an orange sparkle skirt. I was one of only a few people wearing a costume. Oh well. I did appreciate seeing the Pi mile marker at 3.14 miles. Ahh...PHM a race I swore I would not do again this year, but it looks like I will be doing it as a "balloon lady." More on that in an October blog post.

It is a pretty route. Runners were nice. I was concerned when the description said parts of the route were single file -- after all this is an out and back race, we do have to cross paths at some point (for me it was before mile 4, hey, I'm slow and I own it). The narrow parts were the few feet under bridges. We also had to contend with the many other people enjoying the path that day. It was the first hot day of 2015 (temps reaching to the upper 70s) and absolutely gorgeous.

They did try to have some fun with this race. The sign on one side points to the mule. On the way back it says "Same Mule." In 2003 as part of Miles of Mules, 45 mules were auctioned off. I suspect this was one of those mules.

Now would probably be a good time to brag about my overall fabulous pace. Since the diagnosis I have taken nearly 30 seconds off of my per minute pace. Therefore this should have been my fastest PR, right? It was a flat course. What could go wrong? Well, that faster pace only sticks with me for about 5K. I had more than twice that distance to go for this race. I ended up keeping my new pace pretty well for the first four miles, then decided rather than run/walking I would just run. The "wheels" never fell

off, but my fuel runs out. Actually I was able to pick up my walking pace, but only ran a minute or so at a time for the second half of the race. That is something I will have to work on over the next few months. My next long race will be the Princeton Half Marathon on October 4, where Meaghan and I will be encouraging racers to stay ahead of us to the finish line. We will be maintaining a 14 minute pace from beginning to end, rather than my usual jack rabbiting pace that transitions to a death march up Herrontown Road. All kidding aside, I am looking forward to doing this with Meaghan. I met her during the Caffee Gelato race last year. She has the right attitude to make it fun.

Next up: Spring Lake 5 Miler.