Volunteering

A quick search shows I write about volunteering every couple of years. I took a trip down memory lane and read about my past self. Volunteering has been an important part of my life. I feel it is important to share your skills with others. 

In high school I latched onto the phrase Renaissance (Wo)Man. I took it to mean someone who learns a little bit about a lot of things. I'm curious, and want to learn more, but I don't want to become an expert in anything.

My main requirement for being involved is to stay away from meetings. Current volunteer activities include:

Archaeology: digging mostly at Newlin Grist Mill and Fort Mifflin, but also at other places when I learn about them

Theater: building sets, ushering, and reviewing plays are all forms of volunteering. I also see plays and musicals, especially when friends and family are involved with them.

Dress for Success: my commitment to this wonderful organization ebbs and flows. I believe in their mission, but since they hired someone who does the data entry, I have not found my niche. I recently went for a group suiting, and a purse making project. Neither felt like the right fit.

People and Stories: varied ways of helping from events to fundraising calls to brainstorming and cheerleading. 

Bridge Academy: I can't seem to escape this former job, though like with a bad ex, I should. In the past month I helped run the gala and notarize a document. My hope is to not be involved at all with them next year.

Alliance Française: writing the monthly newsletter and sending out other emails

Church: occasional ushering or helping with clean up. I wish I did more.  

There are activities I have dabbled in, but never to the extent of being an expert or even being particularly good at it or successful. Alphabetical order:

Genealogy

Photography

Recommending books (I love to read, but I can never think of good books to recommend)

Roller skating (I can't go backwards or do turns)

Running (I've been stuck at the same level for a decade)

Speaking French (I can't get beyond the basics)

Traveling (I can't seem to book the next trip)

Writing (While I blog, I haven't figured out how to write a book)

I wish I had something I felt like dedicating my all to. I envy those who have that passion. That sense of purpose. I've spent too long wandering aimlessly looking for it. There are so many days I feel like not enough. The rain does not help.

There is always someone better than me out there.

Of course I should also remind myself there are always people out there who can't do what I do, and can benefit from my help.

Dreams for Our Nation's Future

The tide is turning. After a decade of chaos there are signs that POTUS is losing his grip on the Republican Party. As Heather Cox Richardson says, it will get worse before it gets better, but there are signs it will get better.

This week Jenna Bush Hager (granddaughter of President George H.W. Bush, daughter of President George W. Bush, and journalist) sat with each of the four living former presidents for an interview on the Today Show. I've been looking at clips of those interviews. Presidents Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, Barack Obama, and Joe Biden each spoke with optimism for our nation's future. Bush said he has read enough history to know our country has been through rough times, but have come through stronger. With such strong leaders saying we are still a great nation it is easy to feel hope for the future.

HCR, as her followers refer to her, has been asking us to think about what we want for our nation. 

Here are some of my wishes (in no particular order):

1) Equality for ALL

I admit, that's a tall order. I don't want anyone to be treated as a second class citizen due to race, religion, socio-economic status, who they love, gender, or any other box.

2) Raise taxes on the billionaires and corporations

3) Legal and safe abortion rights no questions asked

4) Healthcare no longer tied to employment

5) Paths to citizenship for all

6) Return of soft power programs (including USAID)

If this is all that was accomplished in the first few months, we'd be up to a great start.

What are your wishes for the next administration?

Ten years of Non-Stop Chaos

It is a rainy Wednesday in Lawrenceville, NJ. A good time for me to sit with my laptop and do some write some reflections. As the world becomes increasingly chaotic and divided, I find writing to be my happy place. It is a safe place for me to process my thoughts on the world without having to hold back for fear of hurting someone's feelings (I might still hurt the feelings of someone reading this, but the space gives us both time to diffuse before we meet again).

It has been a rough decade since a certain person announced he would run for POTUS. So many of us dismissed him as a joke until he was elected in 2016. Then we breathed a sign of relief when Biden was elected. We even took off our masks in public (we were outdoors) so we could see each the smiles lighting up our faces. We thought we were past the worst of it. Oh how wrong we were.

Then came the election of 2024. Knowing it would be close, Don and I chose to wait it out in Australia (after voting before we left). In Australia, I felt safe crying in public. The world knew we were in trouble before many Americans realized it.

It has been a decade of chaos. A decade of not being able to tune out because I can't turn away from the dumpster fire. What will happen next? If I stop paying attention, how will I ever keep up? I don't want to be caught off guard again like the time someone said to me that the reason his son does not feel safe in New York City is because of what happened at Columbia University earlier that weekend. I wish I was able to talk to the person now and ask how does his son feel about living in NYC after the mayoral election.

Many mornings I listen to Joanne Freeman's ramblings while making breakfast. Every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday I am glued to Heather Cox Richardson's video messages. In between I listen to Jimmy Kimmel's monologues. 

I need to feel less alone with my thoughts about the state of our nation. 

Joanne often talks about community. The community she built through her YouTube Channel. While I admire her, I don't see myself talking to a bunch of random people. 

I long for an in-person community. People I can reach out to and say "let's get some tea or ice cream, or poison of your choice" and have them say "meet you at the usual place in ten minutes."

My community is spread out around the globe. I pick up friends and acquaintances as others pick up seashells or shoes or souvenirs. They become part of a greater collection. I don't know if that makes any sense. I smile whenever we have a conversation -- no matter how long it has been. I rarely hold a grudge no matter how long it has been.

My menagerie includes people I met in middle and high schools, college, graduate school, Rotary Club, jobs, mommy and me activities, volunteering, churches, ancestery.com, community theater, neighbors, archaeology, friends of friends, online groups, travels, etc. I stay in touch with a wide assortment of people, but never as part of a clique. Even in college, I spent time with a variety of people. 

I keep in touch with select people from each stage of my life. For years after I left my first job, I organized dinners every few months. With my co-ed fraternity I organized backyard BBQs every couple of years, not just for the ones I went to school with but for all Kappas and their families. 

I send out over a hundred Christmas cards each year, and receive about half as many back. Some are family, but many are friends I collected over the decades. All are meaningful to me and I want to stay in touch with them.

The past ten years have strengthened some of these relationships, and drained others. People I thought I shared values with I realized I didn't when they voted for the person who is the biggest threat to our democracy. It warms my heart to talk to people on a deeper level once we realize we have a shared sense of the path we want our nation to be on, and are willing to stand up with me to make that possible.

I look forward to the decade after this regime is over. I long for a time I can step away from the constant barrage of news and trust those in charge have my best interests at heart.

"It's Never Too Late"

Lou, my parents' 95-year old former neighbor, debuted his play, aptly titled: It's Never Too Late. 

During the pandemic, Lou set his mind to writing this musical. His son, Joe, is a famous Broadway playwright. Lou had a story in his mind loosely based on his past, embellished with a story he felt he wanted to share. 

Taken after the February 2025
staged reading

Lou passed away after seeing the dress rehearsal, and writing the cast a lovely email, but before opening night. He saw the fulfillment of a dream and died happy. His life is an inspiration, and reminder for the rest of us to keep chasing our dreams. After all, "it's never too late."

What is Up with People?

In an effort to not park my car directly behind a driveway, or block a mailbox (even though it is a Sunday), I inadvertently blocked part of a driveway. Mind you, it was a double wide driveway in the suburbs, and my car overlapped with it by only a few feet. There was plenty of room for the cars in the driveway to get out.

What would you do if you had noticed my car?

A) Knock on your neighbor's door to ask them to move the car

B) Call the police

C) Maneuver around it

My first instinct would be to carefully drive around the car and assume it wouldn't be there forever. I'd probably park on the street (I was not blocking any cars in the driveway, I hadn't realized it was as wide as it was). If my car was blocked, I'd knock on my neighbor's door. After all, this would be faster than calling the police and I would get on my way faster.

Of course, said person called the police who came knocking on my friend's door. My first instinct when he asked about the owner of a light blue Corolla (it is not a Corolla, but after what happened to my car last summer, I thought someone hit my car. Again.). I was glad I only needed to move my car up four feet.

I vented my frustration to the homeowner's husband. His reaction: of course the police should be called. People need to learn how to drive. He recalled a situation a couple of decades ago when high school students moved their trash cans and blocked their mailbox. 

He called the police on them. And is still carrying a grudge, even though in the meantime they have designated his street as requiring a permit during school hours. 

I asked him if it was a repeat offender. He said it was often the same car. I asked if he ever left a note explaining the situation. He said it was not his place to teach the person how to drive. The student got a ticket. Fortunately, I only got a lecture from him. The police we pleased I moved my car quickly. I think even they could see I wasn't blocking much of the driveway. 

As he shared his oft-told story (the wife had also shared the story with us) I just stared at him like he had three heads. I knew he'd never see my side. Perhalps he never makes any mistakes.

What happened to kindness? To not bothering the police for petty things? What happened to empathy? They know their neighbors. Sounds like they have at least a pleasant relationship with them.

The situation brought back to mind the time our neighbor called animal control because our cat sat on her front porch and used an empty patch of dirt as a litter box. After complaining to us about our orange cat doing this, we kept him inside. He soon died. Then she called animal control over the white and grey cat. Guess she felt she needed to elevate the situation because we didn't take her concerns seriously enough? The relationship has not been the same. I say hello when we pass. Don ignores them.

A second frustrating situation happened last night. We gathered for a friend's milestone birthday. As there were nearly 20 of us, we were seated at two large tables. The menu was pricier than Don and I normally eat, but we were told the portions were enormous. We were encouraged to order family style. Most entrees were around $35. The birthday boy's was $140. His best friend (who we all met for the first time that night) ordered the $205 surf-n-turf. Three of us ordered $35 entrees and shared. One person did not order a meal. The bill came. The extra large dessert split between the two tables was on our tables' bill, as was the birthday dinner. 

The friend paid for his $205 meal separately, then divided the rest of the bill -- including all drinks, the birthday dinner, and the large dessert among the other seven at our table. Rather than thinking we'd spend about $100 to go out (still more than we ever spend when the two of us go out), we were each told to cough up $68 ($136 per couple). I will be steaming about this a long time. The friend should have paid separately for his $205 dinner, then divided the rest by eight, which would have worked out to $53 each. I'll never see this person again, and will likely assert myself strong the next time we meet with our friend. Set clearer ground rules. At least the others didn't order alcohol and appetizers. When you are being treated, don't order an entry five times more expensive than everyone else at the table. We went into it knowing we were splitting the bill, but still did not budget that much for the night out.

I know, in the grand scheme of life, $36 is not that much money. It is more the feeling of being taken advantage of.

I feel better just writing all this down. I hope the people referenced realize I tried to keep identifying factors off. Writing helps me heal.

The Return of the Cherry Blossoms

Last year Don and stopped by Branch Brook Park in Newark, NJ to see their massive collection of cherry blossoms. It was a busy day. We had less than an hour after we parked because we were heading into New York City. Cars were ALL OVER THE PLACE! The weather was stunning. It was Spring Break for local stores. Though we went on a Thursday, cars were all over the place. We told ourselves we should return next year, but with the tandem bike.

The weather was hotter this year, but there were less people around. Easter was earlier. Schools were in session.

What a difference a year makes. Temperatures were a sunny 90 degrees. There were some people posing for pictures, but even more people running and cycling. Many people, myself included, wore pink in honor of the blossoms. We were easily able to park in the official cherry blossom visitor center parking lot. 

We explored the trails from the top to bottom. As the park hosts a 10k race, we suspect there are at least 6.2 miles of paths  (or else they would do a shorter race). Other than getting stuck in the mud, which at least provided a soft landing, we had a good time. I have a few bruises on my legs, but now that the temperatures are in the 40s, no one is seeing my legs. May they heal before I start wearing shorts again.

The tandem was definitely the better way to explore the park.

Newlin Grist Mill Spring Finds

The weather has been all over the place this Spring. We have 80 degree days, with the wind forcing 30 degree days. For the first time in at least a decade, the snow lasted the entire winter. As someone said to me, "it was a real winter." I'm happy with less real ones.

Around the equinox we were able to start the digging season at Newlin Grist Mill. As I turn down Cheney Road in Glen Mills, Pennsylvania the anxiety of driving on I-95 fades away. I park on the hill next to the Trimble House and walk to greet the trench team. When I finally make it I am greeted as warmly as Norm was when he stepped into Cheers. This week I was greeted with "I'm so glad you are here, you can help Keith with the measurements." 

Our core group bonded through our crash archaeology class last winter, about six months after I started digging there, and is slowly starting to grow. We've added Courtney, Brian, and Logan as regulars. Tom and Bob are planning to return soon. Ed, Martha, and Mike are there nearly every week. Dan comes when his job allows. We seem to have lost Paul over the winter. Most live within the greater West Chester area. I am travel the furthest. Courtney travels 45 minutes to an hour in the opposite direction. She is our youngest team member. Martha and I are thrilled to have another woman on our team.

Keith is our leader. Keith is the site manager at NGM, and a professional archaeologist. He is looking for clues that fill in the unwritten, undocumented stories at the mill. He rejoiced the loudest when a basement wall and floor were discovered. He long suspected the Trimble House had a side basement, but there was no real proof. It turned out the wall was TWO INCHES away from where we had been digging our five foot by five foot unit. It is a beautiful wall made up of large stones that ends at a solid stone floor. 

I get excited by the artifacts we find. I also enjoy
making site plans and filling out reports. I do enjoy washing the artifacts because it feels like magic when they come to life. Digging is probably my least favorite part of archaeology, which is probably good because I compliment those who only like to dig. It is at the point where Keith has to prod me to go into the hole. It is backbreaking work. Lifting weights at Planet Fitness this winter has helped me gain the muscles needed to be an asset on the team.

Before the season gets too far ahead, I wanted to share pictures of some of my favorite 2026 finds:

Look at those layers!