Triggering COVID Memories

Last week I returned to Notre Dame High School's football field for the first time since the summer of 2020, the day we had part three of Ashley's high school graduation. 

The reason for my return six years later was to watch my niece's marching band perform their halftime show (though, since they were the away team, it turned into a pre-game show). I sat in the bleachers between mom and my brother-in-law and the feelings of the Covid-era washed over me. 

I pictured Ashley on the 40-yard line, with Ms. Brydges (who I now call Brittany) sitting at the head of her row in front of her. I thought of how far apart we sat, though we were still near Rose's parents, Jim and Tracey. I missed having my parents, siblings, and nieces and nephews with us. 

I tried to explain to Chris that a stage
was set up there. The rows were spaced apart. Masks on. Only two guests per graduate. Such a different scene from the Cure Arena graduation we had anticipated. The one Chris's son had two years later. The one his daughter expects to have next June. Of course, by this point in 2019, we anticipated Ashley's class would also graduate in the arena as had the class of 2019 and others.

My pictures were so crummy that day. It is as if there were teardrops on my camera lens. A day so important, yet these are perhaps the worst pictures I have ever taken. 

I pointed to the grotto and tried to explain to my mom how we lined up and took pictures when they thought that would be our only graduation ceremony. One group at a time. Only people who live with you. Though, as we stood in line, it seemed people invited their extended families. We abided by the rules. 

I sat in the bleachers, under the Friday
Night Lights, and unsuccessfully tried to explain the emotions swirling around me. We'll never get back what we lost in 2020. I could see eyes glazing over. The memories were mine alone.

We just have to move forward and making even better memories.

Six years later and there are lots of exciting things on our horizon. Trips in the plans. Ashley and Anna's wedding. Hayden and Aimee's graduation. David and Abby's wedding. Our screened in porch is about to break ground.