Halloween 2020

 

Halloween was a bit different this year. 

There was talk of cancelling it for safety, but parents have had enough and wanted their children to be able to trick or treat.

People made tubes to shoot candy from the top step down the tube to a socially safe distance away. The ones I saw on Facebook looked like fun.

I went to a Zoom Murder Mystery Halloween Party. It was fun talking to people without wearing a mask, and about something new, but it was odd not interacting with people. 

After the Halloween party, Don and I ate out and drove to walk the boardwalk in Ocean Grove and Asbury Park. Unlike what we would have expected with Halloween landing on a Saturday, and a full moon to boot, we hardly saw anyone wearing a costume, nor did we see any parties.

That sort of sums up the year. Very sedate.

Pandemic Life

 I know I have not written much lately. I have great blog posts in my head, and no energy to make them move into my fingers and onto the screen.

Overall, life has been draining. I spend too much time on my laptop or phone, and too little time with people. I feel disconnected from life.

Seeing people brings a new set of challenges. Masks or no masks? Trump or Biden? Or worse ... "I don't care who wins."

I feel I can't get diabetes under control, despite finally finding a caring doctor and agreeing to take medicine.

Work has been draining. A three week construction project finally concluded after nearly three months. Which should have been expected, but still. I was kicked out of my office over a weekend and found my desk in the board room (a room with four entrances and no privacy). Still, I tried to smile my way through it.

Trying hard to put an online gala together, but get told what I am doing is wrong when I try to do it differently than when it was in person -- it is a different event! Accept it!

Ashley is coming home in two weeks. Will she return to Muhlenberg in February? Who knows. As Coronavirus cases keep climbing no one wants to commit to having the students return. On the other hand, the school depends upon the tuition and housing dollars to pay their staff, and maintain their facilities. No students = no revenue. Less students = less revenue. It is not all about money, but a good bit of it is.

All these thoughts spin around.

At least we know in 73 days we will have a new President. There is a countdown to hope.

"I feel like I can breathe again"

 

Yesterday I felt a lot lighter when the 2020 Presidential election was called for former Vice President Joe Biden. Both Don and I felt we could finally breathe again -- a sentiment I heard from others. 

Four years of dread replaced by hope. Hope that Joe and Kamala will work to unite our country. Hope that we now have a leader more interested in the country than in himself, or in his ratings. Hope that it is okay to smile and love.

There was dancing on Broad Street in Hopewell in front of Heidi's shop. Heidi orchestrated 4,000 postcards being mailed to encourage Bucks County voters to vote. They were targeted to registered Democrats who rarely vote. I filled out 60 for her (plus another 40 for a different organization).

It worked! Bucks County flipped to blue (Democrat). Pennsylvania overall flipped from red to blue. They were the state that brought Joe and Kamala to the finish line. (I feel what I did mattered.)

Four days after Tuesday's election, a winner was declared. Though there is no concession speech from the current President, none is needed in order for this transfer of power to take place on January 20, 2021 -- in 73 days.

The weather in Central Jersey cooperated, too -- mid-70s. Blue skies. No wind. Perfect for street parties taking place from New York to Wilmington to Philadelphia to Washington, DC. 

World leaders are congratulating the United States on getting it right, and seem excited to work with Joe and Kamala.

There is still a lot of hard work that needs to be done. The Coronavirus keeps setting new daily records. The Right is upset about any photos of the Left celebrating without wearing masks (though they did not seem to say the same when their side was holding indoor rallies, or the President was holding an event in the Rose Garden without people wearing masks). The Right doesn't want us to gloat -- but it is hard to not smile after four years of living under an erratic leader.

Even with all the hurdles, it feels nice to breathe again. To feel hope. To feel we can get out of this.

Nine Days Left

There are nine days left until the 2020 election. What a strange time it is, and will continue, to be. There could not be two more diametrically opposed candidates. There could not be a more divisive pool of voters. It will all come down to the wire. Nothing anyone says will be able to sway the other side. On top of that, most people I know have already voted. 

Life is overwhelming. In the end maybe half the people will be happy. Maybe half will be miserable. Then there are the people who vote third party, Libertarian Jo Johnson, because they agree with her platform and hate both Donald Trump and Joe Biden that much.

As with what happened in 2016 the nation is divided to the point it hardly makes any sense to stay as one country. If only the divide was along the Mississippi River or Rocky Mountains then we could split easily. Instead most of the East and West Coasts want Joe Biden (or at least not Donald Trump) and the inside wants Donald Trump (or at least not Joe Biden).

It is scary.

The men themselves are polar opposites. What they stand for are a complete odds -- individual state rights vs. one America; not wearing masks (or believing in science) vs. wearing masks (and listening to science; believing the head of the party knows everything vs. recognizing he does not know everything and instead listens to experts. One who has no empathy vs. one who has always shown he cares. One who only thinks about himself vs. one who thinks about others.It is mind blowing.

Facebook friends are afraid of Joe Biden's tax plan to only increase taxes for those making over $440,000 a year -- I'm assuming that means they earn more than $440,000 along with one percent of Americans. They fear for their personal financial welfare.

My heart aches. 

I don't want to continue to live in Donald Trump's America. I've written letters and postcards to people living in Pennsylvania -- Democrats who rarely vote. We need their votes. The last election was decided by a few voters in a swing state when Hillary Clinton received move than 3 million votes it didn't matter because Donald Trump won the electoral college vote.

It isn't fair.

In nine days we still won't know who won, but the swaying will end followed by days or weeks of waiting for the answer.

No matter the outcome, life will still be messy for "the foreseeable future."

Yes, that scares me.

Six Months into the Pandemic

 For me the pandemic began six months ago on March 11, 2020. That was the day it was obvious we were going to have to postpone our gala and hunker down for a little while. I had no idea "a little while" would be six months and still no end in sight.

So much has changed. It is hard to remember life before the pandemic.

In no particular order the following aspects of life have not returned to the point where we can fully participate:

* Theater

Some theater groups are starting to explore doing outdoor performances. Indoor theaters are still closed in this area. Broadway is hoping to reopen in January 2021, but even that feels optimistic.

* Sports

Some Major League sports are having games in empty stadiums. We went to see "Toy Story" at Trenton Thunder's stadium. They could only sell tickets to 500 people. At $5 a ticket that doesn't pay to keep the lights turned on.

* Dining out

New Jersey was the last state to allow indoor dining, and that was at 25%. When we went to pick up take out from Tiger Noodles we saw one couple dining -- outside, no one was inside. I hope restaurants can survive.

* School

K-12 schools "reopened" this week. Lawrence Township Public Schools are 100% virtual. The Bridge Academy is about 90% in-person, but respectful of those who want to stay home and learn virtually. Saint Ann's is doing a hybrid model similar to Bridge. At the college level Muhlenberg has freshmen on campus, but many of their classes are online. 

* Hanging out with friends

Do you wear a mask or not wear a mask? Wearing a mask adds a barrier to holding a conversation, but not wearing one means you might end up with a deadly disease that you can pass along to others. We ate dinner with a friend yesterday -- he sat 12 feet away from us and we spent the meal shouting to each other. 

* Traveling

A quick google search shows our passport allows us to travel to 39 countries. Last year we could travel to 116 without a visa. Once you arrive in a country, you are still expected to quarantine for 14 days. We can't even travel to Canada.

* Church

We will continue to meet virtually. Some churches are meeting in person. Some are doing so outside -- but despite a glorious spring and summer, not many places took advantage of outdoor worship. Those meeting inside are limiting the number of people who can gather. WiNK will meet in person next weekend, but then move to the virtual world again. I'm not interested. I'm already worshiping globally online. I don't want to do the same with the church down the street from me.

My birthday was last week. Someone described it as my "Corona Birthday." May we each only have one -- even those with mid-March birthdays. At this point I don't see life returning to any semblance of the past until at least March. They hope is we have a vaccine by early 2021, but then the vaccine still needs to be accepted and distributed -- no easy task in the age of "fake news" and distrust of our leaders.

I'm still disappointed we did not get to celebrate Ashley's senior year, and will never be able to celebrate it. Does she care? I don't know. She won't tell me.

As of Thursday, there are no active cases of Coronavirus at Muhlenberg College. That is only because they run the school with a tight fist. No gatherings allowed. Only one person from your floor is allowed in your dorm room at a time. Most activities are virtual. The trade off to no cases is limited fun.

Does this bother Ashley? I don't know. She won't tell me.

I know she is making some friends because she tells me some names. I don't know anything about them, nor am I likely to learn about them. Is Greg a boyfriend or simply a boy who is a friend?

A friend from high school posted: What is our end game? That is the magic question. It can't be zero cases nationally because Polio still had 95 cases last year. It can't be a vaccine because too many people are stating they will not take a vaccine (including people who normally take vaccines). 

Was the goal to crush the entertainment, religious, restaurants, and sporting industries while making it nearly impossible to teach, because that seems to be what has happened.

I don't know how we will come out of this.

We Turned into THOSE Parents

Without trying to, we became THOSE parents, the kind that buys a non-family-friendly car the moment the child leaves for college. 

It actually started a year earlier when I bought a 2-door baby blue convertible tentatively named Veronica for my 50th birthday.

This was followed by Don purchasing a royal blue 2008 Honda Element last week. Though technically a 5-door car, the Element only has two doors that can be opened with handles leading to a passenger seat. To be fair, it does have a lot of storage space, making it the perfect car for moving someone in and out of college repeatedly.

The Element (tentatively called Ellie) came after Ruby the Honda CRV died as we pulled in front of our house after dropping Ashley off at college.

It took visiting Ashley at school for me to appreciate how there is no way we would have bought this car if we were still trying to get three of us places. It was annoying enough having to juggle to open the back door for the three four hours we were together. Laughably annoying. Perhaps that did not help the already tense visit.

Ellie was found on CarGurus.com. Unfortunately she was located in Virginia -- a state on New Jersey's travel ban list by about 10 miles. After trying to have them deliver the car for a fee) we realized it would be easier to drive to Sterling, Virginia to pick it up ourselves. So we drove 3.5 hours each way to pick up a car, only to then have to drive it 3.5 hours home. The entire transaction was conducted outside while wearing masks.

Don loves the new car. It can fit his bike inside without having to take off the front tire. It should also fit the tandem bike inside, though for that we will have to take off the front tire. It has lots of space, enough to fit an entire dorm room.

Sounds like we have empty-nester mentality.

I want a Birthday Do-Over

I was excited to be spending the day before my birthday with our daughter. I bundled the items she left behind when we hurriedly packed to send her off to college. Hurriedly because though we have known for years she was planning to go to college, with COVID, we didn't know if she was actually going to be in a dorm. It has been a roller coaster.

I asked if she preferred to go Saturday or Sunday. Sunday was Club Fair (done virtually) so we went with Saturday. I offered to let her bring a friend (she declined saying she wanted us to herself). 

I don't know what went wrong. Don and I took separate cars so we could leave one on campus (she was happy about that). We brought his new to him car so she could see it (she was less happy about that). 

Conversation was stilted. She insisted on wearing her mask the entire time because we haven't been together in two weeks (yes, she is right, but I still wanted to see her entire face). She yelled at us for being on campus (how were were supposed to get several piles of items to her? She never once offered to meet us a couple of blocks away and haul the stuff herself. Nor did she say "I don't really need sweatshirts," or the other items she requested.)

Questions were met with one word answers. I tried to think of creating open-ended questions, but I've never had to do that with her before.

We went for a walk in the rose garden near her school. We took her grocery shopping (though now that she has a car on campus, it was an unnecessary errand). We took her out to a nice dinner (she kept the mask on to sip her water, but did take it off to eat). 

She had plans with friends at 8. By 7 we dropped her off at her dorm (at least we didn't make her walk home from the restaurant). We plan to see her again in a couple of weeks when her laptop FINALLY arrives, but might just drop it off and enjoy dinner without her.

When Don and I were driving home I complained that didn't go well. I wanted a do-over. I didn't have a plan for a do-over, just that I was feeling disappointed. In the morning we talked through ideas and settled on going into NYC. The weather was perfect, but we didn't have any idea of what to do -- which is often a recipe for disaster.

We drove into NYC (not ready for mass transit, plus street parking is free on Sundays). We headed to the High Line, only to discover you can only enter between noon and 8 with a free timed ticket. It was 11:15 and all the timed tickets were claimed for the day.

Now what?

We headed to Greenwich Village -- a place we have never walked around. Our trips to NYC usually include seeing a Broadway show, or at least walking around Central Park. Mind you, we parked at Broadway and 40th, so we did a lot of walking.

I wanted a nice lunch for my birthday. Instead I had an amazing lunch at Pastis in the Meat Packing District. I was attracted to Pastis over the other restaurants because their huge outdoor dining area was packed. I ha no idea what type of food they served. I knew it would be expensive (it is NYC). Looking at the menu I was in love -- Pastis is a French restaurant. I immediately drooled over the quiche. I encouraged Don to have the Croque Monsieur (grilled ham and cheese) both were served with a small salad (and not pomme frites). We dined outside (as is the only way to dine in NYC these days). Joseph, our masked waiter, made it easy to forget we were living in a pandemic. He was charming and never rushed us. The food was heavenly. It was the lightest, fluffiest quiche I have ever eaten. I told Don this is a meal I will remember for years.

We walked around a little longer before heading home to hear the carillon at The Lawrenceville School. As students are returning this week, and the campus wants to quarantine, this will likely be our last visit for a while. A little birdie told Nina, the woman who plays the carillon, that it was my birthday. She played "Happy Birthday" for me as a treat. It certainly made me smile. 

My parents invited us over for dinner, which was also lovely. There is always the "masks on, masks off" debate, especially hearing stories of how the virus is mostly spread among family members and close friends deemed "safe." It is a tough call we face every day -- it is easier to hear without masks, it is also easier to read facial expressions. As we were meeting for dinner, we had them on part of the time and off part of the time.

In the end, it turned out to be a lovely birthday.

Someone wished me a happy Corona Year Birthday. Hopefully we'll all only have one Corona impacted birthday. As we are nearly six months into the struggle (in my world it started on March 11th as I postponed the gala eight months), I wonder when it will end.