Four Years as a Mule

Last weekend Ashley graduated from Muhlenberg College. Three days later I'm taking some time to reflect on the past four years, and graduation weekend. Right now, at this moment, the pandemic both seems like something out of science fiction and a newly reopened wound. Reading what I wrote as she started college really brings back those feelings.

The feelings started as Don and I spied on the candlelight ceremony (which we knew was only open to students). Muhlenberg prides themselves on upholding certain traditions. Ones that are passed down from class to class so no matter when you attended the school, you are united in these traditions. I'm under the impression since our graduation, our state school alma mater has created traditions future generations will share -- including running through a fountain that wasn't there in the early 1990s.

Candlelighting is one of only two times the entire class is together. The first happens during their very night on college. The second is during the last night before graduation. It was one of the traditions we learned about during a zoom session when Ashley chose to go to Muhlenberg. In August 2020, it was an impossible dream so they gave everyone a glow stick and told them to put it in their windows at a specific time. I'll try to find a picture to show the sad looking glowstick.

I'm glad we eavesdropped on candlelighting. The speeches were more genuine than the ones at the formal ceremony for parents and families. I believe it was the senior class president who quipped, "we are the only class to have the campus to ourselves!" in reference to how at the start of freshman year only first year students were allowed to live on campus (plus select upperclassmen). Jenna, the campus chaplain, spoke of their resilience to surviving the altered reality when they started college. On the positive, they were the only class to be able to have cars on campus all four years and have singles as freshmen. The downsides included virtual classes, wearing masks everywhere, assigned showers and bathroom sinks, the constant threat of being sent home for breaking rules or because COVID cases rose, not having help moving in, having an assigned time to move on and off campus, partitions in the dining hall, isolation if you caught COVID, etc. etc.

Despite the pandemic, or perhaps because of it, Ashley made wonderful friends. The people she bonded with her first few weeks of college were the ones she still hung out with her senior year. Some joined sororities. She didn't. Some studied abroad. She did. Some others, like her girlfriend Anna, joined the mix, but the core group remained solid, and I expect will be lifelong friends. 

Freshman year she roomed with Abby. Abby's mom shared on the parent FaceBook group (something else that came about because of the pandemic) that the girl her daughter was going to room with was not moving to campus in the fall. She was also into theater. I connected her and Ashley. Turned out they had a lot in common. Fast forward three years and they were in the same duplex senior year. 

Sophomore year was better. Muhlenberg created SOAR (Sophomore Orientation and Reconnection) as a way to give back the traditions they missed out on the prior year. Candlelighting was one of these traditions, along with a trip to Dorney Park (a local amusement park). They also had the athletes help the sophomores move in (of course some of these athletes were sophomores themselves). The only time the campus photographer captured a picture of Ashley was at candlelighting. Due to the rain, their candlelighting ceremony was held inside the Empie Theater rather than outside. The next day (or a couple of hours later?) the Class of 2025 had their candlelighting ceremony.

Abby moved in with the person she was supposed to room with freshman year, and Ashley roomed with Molly -- someone from her floor. This weekend Molly commented that she and Ashley have had the same hair length throughout college. 

Sophomore Year

Junior Year with Greg

Senior Year with Hannah

Junior Year went by in a blur because we knew she was leaving in a few months to study abroad in Italy. Ashley and Molly shared an on-campus apartment with Greg. The apartment was in such rough shape it made the school paper because the ceiling was falling in. "Campo" was able to patch it enough that they could live in it until December break. Ashely and Greg went to Italy. Molly stayed in the apartment by herself the following semester.

Senior year was also a blur. All of a sudden it was time for graduation and moving home. By the time she stepped on campus in September 2023, COVID was already a distant memory. Traditional normal was around, instead of the "new normal." People still caught COVID, but they took it easy and wore masks. There were no longer any threats about being sent home.

During Senior Week, the Class of 2024 could (and did) celebrate the milestones of past classes. They had a senior ball, with at least one of them (Ashley) wearing the gown they bought for Prom and has sat unused for four years. They hung out with their professors. They took pictures together. They were finally able to relax. After finishing high school in isolation, I am grateful that had that time together. 

I'm also sad the Muhlenberg Class of 2020 missed out on those experiences. Once lost, the memories just cannot be regained.