Cleaning out My Closet

 

When Ashley was little, my friend Carin was selling Creative Memories products. I heard her spiel about how pictures can tell a story. She shared a picture of her with badly cropped bangs. Not the most flattering picture of her (nearly two decades later, I remember the story, but not the picture). The story is she trimmed her bangs right after learning she and her husband were selected to adopt a baby girl. In an effort to clean herself up, she trimmed her bangs herself. They looked awful. To her, though, looking at the picture reminded her of the excitement of finally becoming a mom.

This brings me to this Talbots outfit I purchased in the mid-1990s. I had helped an older man (I recall he was in his 70s, please don't tell me he was only in his 50s) with understanding the new technology of the day (might have been WordPerfect, definitely pre-internet days). It probably took me less than half an hour to explain to him how to work the computer. I wasn't expecting more than the proffered "thank you." A couple of days later he brought 23-year old me a $25 gift card to Talbots because that was where his wife liked to shop (likely she was also in her 70s). It was a thoughtful gesture.

I took the gift card to Franklin Mills Mall, to the outlet version of a store where I would never shop on my own, to buy something. Anything. I was not going to let a gift card go to waste.

I bought the pictured outfit. The spandex boxy top was a little more in style in the 1990s than it is today. The silky skirt was dressy for work (even by 1990s standards). But it was a complete Talbots outfit for $25. Someone (not so helpfully) pointed out it was last year's style, which is why it was at the outlet.

I wish I could say it is a classic and something I would wear today.  

The truth is, the top always felt too big, and the skirt too confining (I have a longer stride than a straight skirt allows). I think I still fit into it, so that's not the issue. The biggest issues are the fabric is too fancy for my life, and it does not have pockets. I cannot recall wearing this outfit even once since Ashley was born 20 years ago.

Still, I cannot part with it. It has sat in the garage in a pile of clothes to donate since at least the beginning of the pandemic. I can't do it. Other clothes have been donated, but the ones from my carefree child-free days I can't part with. I suspect someone would say it is not the clothes, but the idea of being that person. If my memory is correct, this happened before I married Don (though we were engaged) when I was still Jacquelyn Koetting, and not Don's wife or Ashley's mom.

What would 22-year old me think of 52-year old me? What will 82-year old be like? What do I want 82-year me to be like? What can I do today to make sure 82-year old me is like that?