Before I reply to my sister's message asking if she can bring a guest, a stranger, a newcomer, I needed to vent. I called a friend, but it rolled to voice mail. I thought about a friend who passed away 7 1/2 years ago and would have talked me off the ledge, but alas, she is no longer with us. Before I could vent to mom, she sent a passive/aggressive message that it wasn't her call since it was at my house. I made the mistake of venting to Don, who managed to make it worse. His response: tell them no, tell them to stop taking advantage of me.
Two days before Thanksgiving I am annoyed. How am I annoyed, let me count the ways:
1) I am annoyed my husband is working the six days leading up to Thanksgiving even though he is semi-retired. He even accepted an extra shift.
2) I am annoyed the two things I have asked him to do (put away his laundry and install a handicap toilet seat for Dad) have not been done.
3) I am annoyed my younger sister did not make mashed potatoes and instead ordered them from a local store.
4) I am annoyed at myself for being annoyed that she did not make mashed potatoes, after all what difference does it make if I don't have to make them.
5) I am annoyed with my younger sister for inviting a stranger to this mix.
6) I am annoyed my daughter has to leave before I was planning to serve dinner because her girlfriend's parents serve dinner at the same time.
7) I am annoyed because instead of helping me with the parts I need help with, offers are being made to help me with the parts under control.
8) I am annoyed with myself for not accepting the help.
9) I am annoyed with my middle sister for not RSVPing and telling me the time is going to work.
10) I am annoyed my middle sister ignored my phone call last night.
11) I am annoyed with myself for being annoyed because maybe she didn't see the call, was legitimately busy, or had a good reason for ignoring me since I never call (she never calls either).
12) I am annoyed my nephew does not like food smells and will likely complain, or they'll arrive too late for Christmas card photos, or will ruin all my hard work.
13) I am annoyed my mom broke her elbow.
14) I am more annoyed she broke her elbow at work and told my friends they couldn't tell me by threatening HIPPA laws, then didn't tell me herself for days and only after I reached out to her.
15) I'm annoyed when I vented to Don instead of saying "we'll make it work," or "you are doing a great job," or "I'm looking forward to the great food you are going to make" he said "all I really want is a pumpkin pie" -- one thing I cut from the list because I've never made one and it seemed like an easy thing to eliminate, but then felt guilty because he doesn't ask for much and that's all he wanted. I'd prefer it if he said HE would make the pie instead of adding to my plate.
16) I'm annoyed when I vented he yelled back at me. He rarely yells. I feel I have to take sides between him and the family I grew up with. After being married for 32 years, I think of them all as our family.
~~~
A week later.
Of course, it all worked out. Neither sister, nor my mom, could lift more than a pound with their dominant hand.
Day of Don did all the after dinner washing, and told everyone I did everything leading up to the day. People thanked me. They had a good time.
Best of all, we had leftovers that lasted until we left for vacation.
Ashley and Anna came early and set the tables. No furniture was broken (I later learned, that happened at a friend's house). No fights. No drama.
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