Long story short, today a friend from college texted me. The longer version is I reached out to her mom when a photo popped up in my Facebook history and I realized this friend is no longer on Facebook. The mom, realizing we had not connected in a while reached out to her daughter, who then reached out to me. The daughter asked "How are you doing?" I'm struggling with how to respond. Do I answer "Fine," even though the only way I am feeling "fine" is in the Louise Penny sense of the word, a nuance most people would not get. Do I open myself up and tell her how I'm really feeling? Bare my soul? Tell her I'm scared. I'm lonely. I'm weary. What is the happy, middle ground. "I'm okay?" I don't want to ignore her text as she has ignored my last few over the years. It turns out she didn't recognize my new number and rather than asking "who is this," she ignored my messages, and the friendship faded to acquaintance, if that. I'm still left with how to reply. If I reply by pouring out my heart and telling her how I really feel and she ignores me again, the hurt will hurt and I'll shut my heart again. If I tell her "fine" or "okay," our friendship won't move forward. I want to know what is happening in her life, and the life of her family. I just don't want to get hurt. Again. Why is friendship so hard? UPDATE: I replied "feeling nostalgic" (in response to the photo that initiated the conversation). Asked how they were doing, and several hours later am still awaiting a repsonse.
Teenage daughter and I are talking about how I don't let her do what she wants to do. How judgmental I am. How her friends and strangers support her decision to shave her head for fun, but I don't. Enter Mimi, the one-eyed kitten. Mimi's favorite game is chasing our 7-year old princess cat and encouraging Lucy to play. Mimi's second favorite game is staring at the squirrels in the backyard and flicking her tail at them. Ashley dislikes both of those games. Ashley would prefer Mimi to sit on her lap and calmly be scratched. That's not what Mimi wanted to do at that moment (though sometimes she enjoys it). I asked Ashley: Now, who is sounding judgmental? Who is trying to control someone else? She got the message I could not convey by talking about the two of us. She saw her role with Mimi being the same as my role with Ashley. Hopefully, she also knows I don't hate her, I just want what I feel is best, which might not be what is really best. I'm so confused.
I woke up feeling "I just can't" today. It is nothing in particular, and everything. I want to post my feelings on Facebook, but I'm not emotionally prepared for the inevitable "buck it up" speech, or telling me my "pity party is over," that I should volunteer to feel better. That my feelings don't matter. So I shove them down again. I shut down again. Today Ashley is shaving her head. I tried to explain why I am against it, and I was met with why don't I let her do what she wants to do, why don't I support her. Her friends think it is great. She gets excited talking to them about it. Then when she talks to us she gets deflated. She hears my voice in her head telling her this is a bad decision. That she is wrong. Oh, Honey, we could all benefit from some group therapy. Do you notice Dad and I hardly talk? Do you notice I'm upset with my mom for the ways she has treated me over the years? Do you notice how hurt I am when you tell me I've hurt you because I don't think you are good enough -- especially since I don't remember ever saying anything like that? Do you know how jealous I am of your friendships because I don't have any? Do you know maybe I have more life experiences and I don't want you to be judged as the weird artsy girl as you are starting this very important (and very expensive) chapter in your life in the middle of a pandemic? Do you realize life is spiraling out of control and changing your hair that drastically is a tipping point for me, especially since I have no control over it? On top of that a teacher who self-identified as having been exposed to Coronavirus has in effect shut down out summer school program. We only had about 50 people participating in it. There is no hope for schools to function this year. On top of that we finally have a President encouraging people to wear masks because of "the Chinese virus." Some say "It's about time." Others say "Even Dr. Fauci dismissed the use of masks in the beginning." How can wearing a mask be so divisive? Life is draining. Don went to bed before dinner last night. When I asked him how he is feeling today he was dismissive. I know he'll never ask me how I am feeling. Nor will Ashley. So, today I just can't. Maybe later today I can. Maybe it will take a few days. The longer I keep it buried, the longer it will take before I feel better.
Most weeks during the Corona Virus pandemic I have visited several worship services. Sometimes I hear the same scripture, but with different interpretations. These would be the weeks church is preaching lectionary. Last week was one of those weeks. Both the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville and the American Church of Paris preached on the parable of the sower. Most Christians are familiar with the text. Some of the seed fell on rocky soil, some fell on thorny soil, some were gobbled up by the birds, some fell on good soil and bore good fruit. Yes, that is a really condensed version of scripture, which I linked in the previous paragraph. Pastor Grant preached at the American Church in Paris about this scripture on his last Sunday at the church. His internship was ending during one of the craziest times in recent Parisian history -- the yellow vest protests, metro strikes, and COVID. I hope he still managed to enjoy Paris. I don't often write about church services, but a week later his 20+ minute sermon (beginning around 37 minutes) stayed with me. Halfway through he talked about the "literary particularities." Quickly he said the rock/rocky soil is Peter (which means rock -- Pierre in French/rock in English). Peter denied Christ three times. He spread the fruit quickly, but did not sustain it. (No mention was made about how he later became the first pope and the foundation (rock) of Christianity.) The thorny soil is the wealthy man who was asked to give everything to the poor and follow Jesus. He had potential but did not bear fruit. The seeds gobbled up by the birds, a phrase only used twice by Mark (the other time was when the Pharoses gobbled up the widows' possessions while she prayed). It is about oppressing poor people trampled soil because it challenged their comfort. The good soil bears fruit is seen in all marginalized oppressed people even though they are told are offensive, including the leper and the woman who could not stop bleeding, still sought out Jesus and ignored the religious leaders. There is a lot more to his sermon. "We all must be actively anti-oppresssion. ... Bearing fruit is a choice." In this last sermon he challenges us to bear fruit. Last week Grant returned to Princeton Theological Seminary, only 15 minutes away from where I live. I hope our paths cross. To God be the Glory.
New Jersey is doing a great job coming back to normal, except where it isn't. Outdoor dining was promised to us on July 2, but other states had spiking numbers so on June 30 that was taken away. Libraries are allowed to open, but our local library does not feel comfortable opening their doors. Instead we have curbside pick up. In theory, this is a great idea. After all we mostly only use the library for picking up books we have on hold. Reality does not match theory in this case.
The library staff understandably fell behind in processing requests. I was getting so impatient I started visiting little free libraries to find reading materials. They weren't books I wanted to read, but better than nothing. I also signed up for Netflix and started watching "The Crown," (which I am enjoying a lot!). They send an email when you have books to pick up. You have to call during their limited hours to make an appointment to visit the tent in the upper left hand corner to pick up the books. You are assigned a 15-minute window. Deep breaths. Everyone is frustrated with the system from the staff to the patrons. It is out of all of our hands. While some libraries are opening, our county has decided not to. Hopefully a solution will happen before the weather turns. Meanwhile, I am enjoying having a huge selection of books to read.
Life came to a grinding halt in March. Everything was cancelled Rightfully so, but it hurt the senior class. Ashley's drama teacher was able to put on a Zoom production of Metamorphases, but there was no way for high school sports teams to still practice and hold games. Everyone understood, but that doesn't mean people didn't wish it was different. As the numbers in New Jersey improved high school baseball teams were able to hold the Last Dance Tournament. According to a friend 222 schools sent teams in an elimination-style tournament. Winners move on, non-winners were done for the season. Ouch, but better than nothing. For some reason the teams had to come up with a new name. His son's team is called Dirty Boyz Liedke Trucking instead of Hamilton West. They had to get sponsors to help off-set the costs. His team somehow scored playing most of their games at Trenton Thunder's stadium. Thunder has been generous to host. Tickets are $10 each, plus a $2 processing fee. No charge to park. They are still required to stick to the 500 person limit for outside gatherings (the stadium can seat over 8,000 people). We were encouraged to socially distance our seating, though no one came around to enforce it. Likewise we were encouraged to wear masks, though no one enforced it, so very few people did it. I'd say about 10% of the people wore masks, and that might be generous. They don't get that one case of COVID traced back to the tournament will shut it all down. The friends I saw and I wore ours. We can only do what we can do. It felt almost normal being outside watching a game. The quality is very good, despite they were not able to have practices. The game I did not go to, his son pitched six innings and was the winning pitcher. High school games only go to seven innings. The weather was perfect. It was nice to have a good conversation. On Tuesday Ashley's school's team will play Hamilton West, otherwise known as the Lawrence Road Irish vs. Dirty Boyz Liedtka Trucking. Not sure who I will root for. Is it okay to root for both sides?
What seemed impossible a couple of months ago became a reality today. Ashley graduated on the football field with her friends, and with their parents and a few teachers and administrators. We didn't really know what to expect. The letter was emailed to everyone made it sound as if they were draining the event of all fun. Could only wear their Kairos jewelry. Must maintain social distancing at all times. No tossing their caps afterwards. Must leave the moment the ceremony is over. The reality was more relaxed. Back in May we were asked to choose between option one and option two for graduation. Option one was a "unique" experience of being filmed walking across the stage, pieced together, and shown on the day graduation was supposed to take place. Option two was an on field graduation before August 4th if the governor allows it (but he likely won't so please chose option one). Many of us wrote back: option three -- both. Perhaps recognizing they are dependent upon alumni dollars, they gave us option three. Within a couple of weeks the governor raised the limit to 500 people at an outdoor event. We were told each graduate could have two guests. We only learned the details on Monday. 9 am. Arrive between 8:15 and 8:45. Will only last for an hour. I'll admit we went into it with very low expectations. I've missed hanging out with Ashley's friends' parents, and other parents we have met over the ten years she went to Catholic school. We found her best friend's parents and sat with them. Fully masked. Further apart than at a football game. I was afraid the speeches would be the same. For the most part, they were, but the salutatorian sneaked in a pitch for people to come see the team play Tuesday night during the Last Dance Tournament. The usually very serious principal cracked a small joke when she said (paraphrasing): "We are gathered for the last time to send off the class of 2020 ... I think." My best guess was 170 of the 268 graduates took place in the ceremony. So about 500 people total (including guests and staff). New alumni were seated apart from each other. Parents were encouraged to socially distance themselves (but no one was in the stands enforcing it). They finally received their diplomas. It felt as if they were holding them hostage because we wanted another graduation ceremony. A nice touch was they put their picture on the envelope with the diploma further ensuring they would go home with the right diploma (I wondered how they would do that). It was nice they sat in order by last name (unlike the videotaped graduation where it was anyone's guess when they would walk across the stage). The beautiful weather also helped. It was sunny and in the low 80's. Ashley wished they seated them differently so the seniors were not facing the sun for the entire service. I'll accept some blame for that one -- originally they would have faced the home bleachers and had their backs to the away side. Parents suggested shifting it so everyone had a side view. Yes, the celebrations have been plentiful. The administration and staff have worked tirelessly to give them yet one more send off. I still wish we could have managed a prom, but hard to do that socially distanced. Maybe Thanksgiving weekend? They just want to see their friends. As many states have cases flaring up, New Jersey has become a leader in keeping this under control. We had less than 300 new cases again yesterday, a far cry from the 4,000 cases a day at the peak. We still can't eat inside restaurants, but the weather is still nice enough for outdoor dining. Our library is still closed, but they are offering curbside pick-up. We can breathe around others, all while wearing our masks as other states fight to have mask laws. Some pictures from today.
Today Don and I left the state of New Jersey. We crossed the Hudson River (by car), parked in New York City, and walked to the Trump Tower.
Our mission? To see the freshly painted Black Lives Matter banner along 5th Avenue.
It was magnificent.
We also saw a Black Lives Matter running protest. The group, mostly wearing white t-shirts and running shorts, stopped at this end of the sign They chanted BLACK LIVES MATTER and the names of some of the most recent victims, then ran off in a pack in a pace faster than I could maintain.
It was also defaced the next day when someone tossed red paint on it. Let me backtrack on our day. While our main goal was to see the two-day old painting on 5th Avenue in front of Trump Tower, we also wanted to see New York City look like a ghost town. It was eerie. We pulled out of the tunnel and immediately found free street parking. That kind of eerie. We saw maybe 50 people in Times Square. Maybe. We saw less people in the Theater District than we saw the night before in Princeton. We saw more people riding bicycles than cars driving. Here is our day in pictures.
Even the statues wear masks.
I did wait a few minutes to take this picture without people or cars,
but not many.
:(
I like seeing the costumes on the top floor,
though I hope they are not fading in the sun,
The world is starved for news. Especially good news. Especially something with variety. When local rock star Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes announced their parking lot concert at the Monmouth Racetrack in Oceanport, NJ, it made news.
NJ.com reviewed it afterwards. The New York Times wrote about it. As did the Asbury Park Press. It was the largest concert since Coronovirus. There were about 1,000 cars, each car holding up to four people. The price was per vehicle. Proceeds went to support the Count Basie Theater, just one of many theaters struggling. Let's backtrack. On Friday morning a friend posted he had tickets to the concert and was looking for someone with a convertible to go with him. I have a convertible. I really wanted to get out and do something that felt semi-normal. Why not?
Rob is friends with Chris and Melissa and invited them to round out the car. Melissa gave her seat to Hayden. The concert was a lot of fun. This was my first Southside Johnny concert, but it likely won't be my last. There was a lot of speculation that his "special friend" would make an appearance, but alas the Boss did not join him on stage. The weather was perfect. We even saw a rainbow without having any rain. We parked in the last row of the VIP section, on the end. They staggered cars in every other space so they were like a checkerboard. Instead of applause, we were encouraged to beep our horns. The volume was soft, especially considering we were in the 5th row and it was gentle background music volume. There were many, many, many rows behind us. The concert was also on the radio, but that's not the same. The price difference between the VIP section and the other was nominal (as Rob said, for $12.50 a ticket, why not splurge). It was an experiment. A successful one that could still be improved upon. Southside Johnny commented early on it was hard to get feedback from the audience because we were all in our "air-conditioned cars" while he was sweating on stage. Looks like he has another concert planned in New York next month. Hopefully he'll learn from the show and improve upon it -- maybe have more speakers and jumbotrons. "We're all guinea pigs on the wheel," said Southside Johnny. For Rob the "real highlight
was when hundreds of cars started honking in rhythm to a horn riff and
it evolved into a call and response between the horn section playing it
and the car horns playing it - unplanned and without any direction from
Johnny. One of those magical moments of connection between band and audience manifesting itself in a brave new way. "Later
in the show Johnny tried to encourage something similar to happen
again, and it didn't quite work - which underlined how cool the earlier
spontaneous emergence of that interaction had been."
Rob in the zone
Southside
Johnny is driven through the parking lot to greet fans before a
performance during the Drive-In Live series July 11, 2020, at Monmouth
Park in Oceanport, New Jersey.Matt Smith | For NJ Advance Media (I was too slow to take my own picture.)
There are more concerts planned at the race track.
A friend hit the nail on the head when she said those words to me: You need someone to listen to you. I nearly broke down in tears reading her reply to my message. She succinctly said what has been floating around my heart, but without words.
More than someone, I need a friend to listen.
I have people I can reach out to who will share what is happening in their lives, and suddenly have to go and not call me back when they are free.
Those are called acquaintances.
Acquaintances are important to have in life, but they cannot fill the void that can only be filled by having a true friend.
They say you have to be a friend to have a friend. I try. I reach out to people. I listen to them. I reach out through email, messaging, texting, and phone calls. I feel I always reach out first. People appreciate it, but they don't reach out first to me.
I don't know what to do. I can't force someone to like me enough to include me in their bubble of friends.
Even when I visited with the person who said I needed someone to listen, she spent much of her time on her phone because of a problem that had to be solved. Loved ones called and she answered to tell them she would call them back later. It still interrupted the flow.
I left feeling as if I was not listened to.
I left feeling worse than I did when I had hope someone would listen to me.
Several days later, I still feel bad.
I watch 9-month old Kitten Mimi try to play with 6 1/2 year old Kitty Lucy and can relate. Mimi just wants someone to play with her. Lucy is a cat. She would be a great playmate. Mimi dashes up to her over and over again only to be hissed at by Lucy and put in "time out" by a human. Yet, she keeps trying. I wish her much success in changing Lucy's mind.
I write to people. They write back. I reply. They don't reply a second time. Yet, I keep trying (with different people) in the hopes I'll find that soul mate who also enjoys quick email conversations and getting to know someone on a deeper level than the "let's pretend everything is great"-land of Facebook. In the past when I've grumbled on Facebook I've been told others have it worse (yes, I do know that). That my time is up for complaining (I didn't know that had a time limit).
Believe it or not, being told my feelings don't matter does not cheer me up.
I still don't know where to turn for that "chin-wagging" conversation. The kind that touches upon a bunch of different topics, when an hour flies by and you still have more to say.
Don and Ashley are great, but after four months of forced togetherness, we have nothing new to say to each other. When we do talk it is often filled with awkward silences or biting comments. We need fresh thoughts.
I think another issue is with Ashley going off to college, I am only meeting other parents and school personnel virtually. The new student sessions are people on a computer screen talking to us, answering questions people type in. No faces of parents or students. No side conversations. Only typed conversations in group chats.
I feel disconnected from life.
And I hate it!
I know no one will respond, even if you bother to read my feelings. If you do read this, please say a quick prayer for me. A prayer I find that person who will listen to me. That person I can be a good friend to, too.
Over a month ago Ashley informed us after much consideration, and talking to her friends, she has decided to shave her head. Her friends are very supportive. They've even offered to come over to watch and help her. One friend has offered to shave her head at the same time. I'm not so supportive. I keep thinking I don't want my girl to look like the strange artsy girl. Yes, I agree that's very judgmental of me.
I also keep having flashbacks to 5-year old Ashley who wanted her hair to be "short like Emma." The day after cutting 10-12 inches off of her head to the length of a chin bob, she tearfully asked me to glue it back on. I don't want Ashley coming up to me in tears because she didn't realize how she would look without hair. Especially knowing it would be at least 6 months before it would look like a hair cut. Ironically when I do reach out to ask someone for advice, they tell me about the time their daughter shaved her head for St. Baldricks or some other reason. Ashley has a co-worker who regularly shaves her head and enjoys seeing how it grows back. Maybe God is trying to tell me something? I toggle between: * I love her * it is only hair * I love her * she is 18 * I love her * she is making a huge mistake * I love her I wish she would wait until after she made friends in college who love her and support her as much as her high school friends do. In the age of wearing masks all the time it will be hard enough to make friends. Every time she postpones the shaving I am filled with hope she will continues to wait. Maybe wait until the new drivers license photo is taken? Maybe wait until after graduation part 3? Surely we'll have a wedding or other celebration where it would be nice to have hair? Oh wait, we are stuck in purgatory of COVID-19, with no opportunities to celebrate again. Very few opportunities to meet new people. *sigh* And, no, I still don't know why this decision bothers me so much. It just does. UPDATE 7/22/2020 Ashley did it. There is no "after" shot because I am still in denial. I admit I am not being very supportive about this decision. I feel we reached the point in life where what her friends' advice is more important than our advice. It happens to everyone. It is a normal part of growing up. I wish I could better handle it, but we are still in the middle of a pandemic where my normal support systems have crashed. I'm jealous for her solid group of friends. I wish I could have been there for the big shave, but I also wish she could have held off until she made solid friends in college. Will she always be viewed at Moravian as the weird artsy chick? Can she carry off that role? Who can I turn to to voice my concerns? Someday her friends will be replaced in importance by a spouse and children. It is natural. Doesn't mean I hurt any less today as I see her fuzzy head and her chopped off pony tails. Doesn't mean I have the words to explain all of this to her.
This "new normal" has lasted far longer than anyone imagined, at least to this level. We all knew life would not be fully back to the "old normal," but I did expect libraries and restaurants to reopen by now.
We went into lock down on March 13 -- 16 weeks ago, or 113 days ago. A third of the year has been spent not being allowed to be near others for fear of passing this disease or catching it from someone else. Based on who is posting something, not sure which is worse. If you have the disease, it might be a mild case and you might heal quickly, or you might be on a ventilator and die. If you are someone who passes the disease to others (think Typhoid Mary) you might kill someone.
Yippee (said dripping in sarcasm).
As cases in 48 states are soaring following their failed reopening attempts, Governor Murphy of New Jersey has put the brakes on our reopening -- well, except for the beach, race tracks, casinos, and a few other places. A few days after telling restaurants they could reopen at 25% capacity, and they rushed out to order food and rehire waitstaff, he changed his mind. I both agree we are not quite ready for that kind of move, and disagree with him for allowing the restaurants to spend money to prepare without compensating them.
Libraries are allowed to reopen, but ours is still trying to figure out how to do so safely. They offer curbside pick up, which would be enough for me if they had time to process requests and let me know that the books the computer says are ready for pick up could be picked up. *sigh* I love my library and miss it.
Many summer camps are going virtual. The Bridge Academy spent the first two weeks online, and plan to spend the last three weeks in person. I pray it works. It will be a great test for September.
While the other 48 states enjoyed bars and spreading the virus, we are still only allowed to enjoy the great outdoors and not theater, sports, and bars (not that I tend to frequent bars). Fortunately the weather has been heavenly for most of the past 113 days.
Canada and Europe have closed their borders to us. I can't say I blame them.
If we travel to one 16 states (Florida, California, Texas, North Carolina, etc.) where the virus is rampant, we have to quarantine for 14 days when we return. Visitors from those states must do the same when they come to New Jersey, New York, Connecticut, or Pennyslvania. Kind of hard to control if you drive from those states (if you fly, I heard you receive daily phone calls making sure you are following orders). That list will change based on where the virus is spiking. This makes it a bit hard to plan a trip.
I saw an airfare for $300 round trip to Tokyo, and another for $92 from San Jose. I can't even contemplate either one.
For now we are still hunkering down at our house. I want Ashley to go to college in August and the only way that will happen is if the virus is contained. The current plan is they will start a week early, come home for Thanksgiving and finish the semester at home. Since that announcement numbers have spiked in most of the country, including Pennsylvania where Muhlenberg is located, but not in New Jersey. In Lawrenceville we are at just over 1% who have been infected.
Don't forget to wear your mask while indoors or within six feet of someone else outdoors. Some say if we all did this, we would be able to contain the virus enough to resume most of what we did last summer. Unfortunately the anti-maskers and other selfish people are not willing to even try.
I'd say I am frustrated, but the truth is more I am resigned to never being able to fully enjoy life again.
A couple of months ago I wrote about how frustrated I am with my diabetes diagnosis. To be honest, it still stinks. I feel a lot of guilt for ending up with such a horrible disease. One the ADA (American Diabetes Association) even encourages you not to get, to the point they make it sound as if it is easy to avoid -- just eat healthy and don't gain a lot of weight.
It ignores that some of us do that our entire lives and still end up with it. Taking a risk assessment quiz, I only hit two categories: age and genetics. My risk is low.
That doesn't change the results of five years' worth of blood work. I can't diet my way out of it (though I have been able to control it that way).
In the post linked above I chronicled my path until the end of May, so I won't repeat that here.
What happened afterward I wrote that post is nothing short of a miracle. I met Dr. Maria "Adi" Benito, a doctor who truly listens. Who treated me with care and compassion. Who wanted more blood work before deciding which medicine I should take (instead of insisting I do what works for most people). Who after seeing the blood work did a few things no one else has done for me:
1) She apologized medicine is the only path, and acknowledged my feelings about handing this holistically are valid (I should have mentioned she is both an endocrinologist and a specialist in holistic medicine -- a combination I didn't think was possible in the United States, let alone in the town next to mine).
2) She fought the insurance company for me and is becoming my strongest advocate.
3) She gave me different ways to reach her (phone, email, text, her front porch) and responds when I do.
4) She signs her messages "warmly" with her nickname, thus breaking the doctor-patient wall into making me feel we are on the same team.
If every doctor showed this much compassion, I believe people would be healthier, if for no reason than they would receive the help and care they need sooner. I was diagnosed over five years ago. Five years wasted trying to find someone who was willing to try a non-traditional approach. Who would look beyond my A1C (which I can control with diet) and see the other numbers that were not quite in control, but close enough. Who would listen when I said I can control it through diet, but I'm tired of this approach and want to eat a greater variety of foods. She is not covered by insurance, but we have such a low end insurance plan not much is covered until we reach our high deductible, so there is not much difference to us. Insurance wants to charge me $15 a pill ($432 a month) because there is no generic form of the medicine she believes will work best for me -- it will stabilize my sugars without making them plummet into hypoglycemic levels, it will help preserve my liver and kidneys. I would only need one pill a day, but still. She called my insurance company and is in the process of negotiating a more affordable rate.
Glad I ignored the note on HealthGrades that said she is no longer accepting new patients and reached out. She has been a lifesaver -- literally.
I am most impressed by places which have reinvented themselves in the age of the Corona virus. Whether it is a restaurant now hosting car hops, or graduations turned in photo ops, places that will survive are the ones changing their way of doing business. Over the years we have enjoyed visiting Howell Living History Farm. Ashley has participated in their hatchery program. Type "Howell" in the search bar on this blog and you'll find articles about their wedding dress exhibit, archaeology camp, tour of the one room schoolhouse and more. Every time we visit we say we should go more often. Knowing they would not be able to offer the usual calendar filled with activities including maple syrup harvesting, sheep shearing, hatchery camp, and so much more due to being closed for the foreseeable future, someone had the foresight to plant more, and spend their energies on growing more vegetables, which would then be donated to local food banks. After all, they have the space. Instead of educating the public about 19th century farming techniques, they are educating the public about how we can all help our neighbors in the 21st century. Their home page says:
Donating Crops in 2020
This year, Howell Farm is donating eggs, whole wheat flour, oats,seasonal produce, and our entire crop of potatoes (¾ – 1 ton if all goes well!) to food pantries and soup kitchens in the Trenton area.
We will also be increasing production of sweet corn, popcorn, and the field corn that’s used for corn meal – as well as sharing farming and gardening information and resources with anyone interested or in need.
If you'd like to see the crops we've been growing and say hello to the horses, you can register for a free tour on CommunityPass and join us Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday afternoon!
As part of their "Share the Harvest" program, Howell Farm is showing off their work. Following the example of their annual corn maze, the farm guided us to ten stations spread out throughout the farm, each one describing part of their program and including a crossword puzzle answer. Find all ten answers and receive a small bag of their flour as a prize. The game could take 30 minutes if you didn't get distracted. Or it could take 90 minutes if you spent time catching up with masked workers from a socially acceptable distance in the great outdoors. If you know me, you know into which category I fell. Yesterday was a beautiful day to be on the farm.
Each of the ten spots had a description of what they were highlighting. The correct answer was in red to make it easier to find. The first station was about beekeeping.
Purely as a guess, there were about five people making sure we did not get lost, and telling us more about what we were seeing. Their goal this year is to grow hearty foods (potatoes, okra, cucumbers, etc.) that they then donate to local food pantries. The numbers are truly staggaring. The Disney side of me wants to call the employees cast members. Instead of wearing 19th century attire, each was dressed in a Share the Harvest light green t-shirt, bottoms of their choice, and a mask. That is just the world we live in and they want to keep everyone safe. While walking the grounds we were allowed to take off our masks and raise them when we saw someone else. A reasonable policy on a warm day. The clockwise path took us along the wagon ride route past sections of the farm we don't normally see. Along the path was Lucy, the two-year old dog who lives at the farm. She was playing catch. It added the idyllic feel of the day. While not the regular routine, it is a nice step towards being open again. Visit the Mercer County Community Pass in order to reserve your space on a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday to go on a tour. Spaces are limited, but there are plenty. Don't let the 50 spaces for each time slot scare you off. They are placing a cap for crowd control purposes, but as it is a self-guided tour each group steers clear of the other groups. If you go, tell Kim I said hi.
For some reason the teams had to come up with a new name. His son's team is called Dirty Boyz Liedke Trucking instead of Hamilton West. They had to get sponsors to help off-set the costs. 
His team somehow scored playing most of their games at Trenton Thunder's stadium. Thunder has been generous to host. Tickets are $10 each, plus a $2 processing fee. No charge to park. They are still required to stick to the 500 person limit for outside gatherings (the stadium can seat over 8,000 people). We were encouraged to socially distance our seating, though no one came around to enforce it. Likewise we were encouraged to wear masks, though no one enforced it, so very few people did it. I'd say about 10% of the people wore masks, and that might be generous. They don't get that one case of COVID traced back to the tournament will shut it all down. The friends I saw and I wore ours. We can only do what we can do.
It felt almost normal being outside watching a game. The quality is very good, despite they were not able to have practices. The game I did not go to, his son pitched six innings and was the winning pitcher. High school games only go to seven innings.
For some reason the teams had to come up with a new name. His son's team is called Dirty Boyz Liedke Trucking instead of Hamilton West. They had to get sponsors to help off-set the costs. 
His team somehow scored playing most of their games at Trenton Thunder's stadium. Thunder has been generous to host. Tickets are $10 each, plus a $2 processing fee. No charge to park. They are still required to stick to the 500 person limit for outside gatherings (the stadium can seat over 8,000 people). We were encouraged to socially distance our seating, though no one came around to enforce it. Likewise we were encouraged to wear masks, though no one enforced it, so very few people did it. I'd say about 10% of the people wore masks, and that might be generous. They don't get that one case of COVID traced back to the tournament will shut it all down. The friends I saw and I wore ours. We can only do what we can do.
It felt almost normal being outside watching a game. The quality is very good, despite they were not able to have practices. The game I did not go to, his son pitched six innings and was the winning pitcher. High school games only go to seven innings.
My best guess was 170 of the 268 graduates took place in the ceremony. So about 500 people total (including guests and staff). New alumni were seated apart from each other. Parents were encouraged to socially distance themselves (but no one was in the stands enforcing it). 
My best guess was 170 of the 268 graduates took place in the ceremony. So about 500 people total (including guests and staff). New alumni were seated apart from each other. Parents were encouraged to socially distance themselves (but no one was in the stands enforcing it). 
The weather was perfect. We even saw a rainbow without having any rain. We parked in the last row of the VIP section, on the end. They staggered cars in every other space so they were like a checkerboard. Instead of applause, we were encouraged to beep our horns.
The weather was perfect. We even saw a rainbow without having any rain. We parked in the last row of the VIP section, on the end. They staggered cars in every other space so they were like a checkerboard. Instead of applause, we were encouraged to beep our horns.
Each of the ten spots had a description of what they were highlighting. The correct answer was in red to make it easier to find. The first station was about beekeeping.
Purely as a guess, there were about five people making sure we did not get lost, and telling us more about what we were seeing. Their goal this year is to grow hearty foods (potatoes, okra, cucumbers, etc.) that they then donate to local food pantries. The numbers are truly staggaring.
The Disney side of me wants to call the employees cast members. Instead of wearing 19th century attire, each was dressed in a Share the Harvest light green t-shirt, bottoms of their choice, and a mask. That is just the world we live in and they want to keep everyone safe. While walking the grounds we were allowed to take off our masks and raise them when we saw someone else. A reasonable policy on a warm day.
The clockwise path took us along the wagon ride route past sections of the farm we don't normally see. Along the path was Lucy, the two-year old dog who lives at the farm. She was playing catch. It added the idyllic feel of the day.
Visit the Mercer County Community Pass in order to reserve your space on a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday to go on a tour. Spaces are limited, but there are plenty.
The Disney side of me wants to call the employees cast members. Instead of wearing 19th century attire, each was dressed in a Share the Harvest light green t-shirt, bottoms of their choice, and a mask. That is just the world we live in and they want to keep everyone safe. While walking the grounds we were allowed to take off our masks and raise them when we saw someone else. A reasonable policy on a warm day.
The clockwise path took us along the wagon ride route past sections of the farm we don't normally see. Along the path was Lucy, the two-year old dog who lives at the farm. She was playing catch. It added the idyllic feel of the day.
Visit the Mercer County Community Pass in order to reserve your space on a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday to go on a tour. Spaces are limited, but there are plenty.